Recently I posted a saying on Facebook that said something like, " Remember the small things because someday they will be huge." I am reminded today of how true that is.
I'm missing my mom a lot these days. Not the kind of debilitating grief one experiences with an untimely and unexpected death, but more of living with the day to day experiences of life.
Today I bought a new sewing machine. I've always loved to create things, and especially in the last ten years or so I have enjoyed the art of quilting. My mother taught me to sew when I was in junior high, and I also attended sewing classes- at Sears of course- so I know the basics and have self- taught the rest. My mom always loved the fact that I sewed and relished my quilting designs, imperfect as they were. Every machine I have had until today was a hand- me- down from her. The latest one was the one she bought to use in the winter in their Florida home. Even though it was modern for the time, I realized recently while fighting with it, that it is 33 years old, the same age as my daughter Emily. So after a year or more of looking, I finally bit the bullet today. I didn't buy the uber expensive foreign models like she had, but it is a top of the line Singer. So far I'm thrilled and have spent much time fooling with it instead of doing Sunday work. While I was driving home, I so wanted to stop and tell her all about it. She would have been happy for me. I had to swallow a few times while driving.
Last Tuesday was the first day of school. She always made a big deal out of it, usually buying me a new top or something in celebration. Driving home that day it seemed so odd not to pick up the phone and call her to report in about my day. Thankfully my sister called me that night, anticipating that I would be missing her that day. I was so grateful.
The little things in life are what you remember as the big ones.
The wine she always had on hand for me for my after school visit was on sale last week. I bought a bottle to take to my friend Sally's house as I knew she would remember all our fun visits.
Another little thing.
On reflecting about the little things, I've realized that one never really misses the big events, such as Christmas, or weddings or other major events. But rather, the silly little day to day things. When I remember Glenn, I think of his silly voices and the late night notes and mementos he would leave me as he meandered the house when he was sleepless.
In my wonderful new relationship I think of the imitations that Jon does to make me laugh so hard I snort, and the wonderful little notes I get sometimes written on the toilet paper roll, or the silly jokes and things that only we are privy to.
The little things are what add up to be really big things. A life built on love and relationships and laughter and memories.
What could be more precious?
Loving the little things as I
Continue the journey.
